Can someone please tell the music licensing team of EA that they should get their shit together? With every sports title out of their house I feel more and more hoaxed. What is this? The game itself is ok, I liked the uber arcady predecessor more, but I’m fine. Street football may be an art form, this game ain’t. Still it’s a good reboot of the series. Nonetheless the absolute mojo killer is the cock blocker of playlist. It’s even worse and toe-curling than the SSX one. This is why I always chose to listen to this instead. Made me feel better. Made the game more enjoyable. Play it fast or don’t even think about it.

What can you possibly expect from a game with the following soundtrack?

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Developer: EA Canada
Publisher: EA Sports
Platforms: PlayStation3, Xbox360
Release: March 16th, 2012

I see what they wanted to do. Some kind of Left for Dead. Unfortunately it’s inferior in nearly every aspect. The artificial unintelligence makes it even impossible to play in single player. It’s flawed yet broken. In the socomesque multiplayer it fortunately works but it’s a pretty mediocre affair. It’s clumsy, bare and dispensable. The Resident Evil universe is so captivating but this one is a major letdown. I hope it won’t infect other releases of the series. Let’s skip this one.

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Developer: Slant Six Games
Publisher: Capcom
Platforms: PC, PlayStation3, Xbox360
Release: March 23rd, 2012

Do I queue up in the hate debate about the multicolored explosions? Definetly maybe. Critics are right, the ending of this epic space saga is indeed sub par. But in the end it’s their design decision. And one can’t argue over gusto. One thing for sure can’t be taken from us, it’s the adventure we had with our very own Commander Shepherd. Bioware’s tour de force trilogy is where the journey is the reward. For this (and the tedious gameplay) it will be remembered. All good.

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Developer: BioWare
Publisher: Electronic Arts
Platforms: PC, PlayStation3, Xbox360
Release: March 9th, 2012

What happens if you cut out all the fun elements in a game? You get something like Journey. Sure it’s art, of course it is. But as Quarter to Three pointed out pretty well is that Journey is like Shadow of the Colossus without any colossi, or Ico without the little girl. Or Bionic Commando without his bionic arm, Catherine without the girls, you get the idea. Where I really enjoyed previous artsy attempts like flOw and flower, Journey comes as an insult. It’s pretentious, shallow and meta in a boring kind of way. And the music sucks.

Let the hate begin…

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Developer: thatgamecompany
Publisher: Sony Computer Entertainment
Platforms: PlayStation3
Release: March 15th, 2012

It’s a pity that local multiplayer is on decline on the current console generation. It seems that if you’re up for being social and stuff, that’s what the pub is for. But still, gathering and playing dumb games and being loud, that’s the essence of video games. And Twisted Metal is probably one of the games – or lickety-split car combat as genre – that captures this particular feeling best. The Rob Zombie meets Grindhouse horror design and the brilliant soundtrack make this game a wonderful package and an experience I’ve been waiting for a long time on this console generation. Give me a mad clown and an armed ice-cream truck and I’m sold. Sure it’s flawed at times, but hell, who are we to tell. Let the carnage begin.

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Developer: Eat Sleep Play
Publisher: Sony Computer Entertainment
Platforms: PlayStation3
Release: March 16th, 2012

Actually I didn’t care about the SSX series back then and still I didn’t care about it when SSX was announced in 2010 as SSX: Deadly Descents. I was rather hoping for some laid-back Skate flick-it action on snow. This uber arcade frenzy with maximal volume hipster soundtrack however got me somehow. Ok the soundtrack is not so my cup of tea (see the worst titles below) this is why I used my own playlist even before I dropped the first slope. The game is fun. The race levels heavily depend on your track knowledge and luck, the trick events require even more luck and the ability to button mash in best street fighter manner. The ‘survive it’ mode however is the one I like best as it’s by far the most thrilling one. This is the edge of the cliff stuff when suddenly the fog turns up and you’re unlikely to see where you’re driving next. Unforgiving, and something you certainly did not expect. Great.

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Developer: EA Canada
Publisher: EA Sports
Platforms: PlayStation3, Xbox360
Release: March 2nd, 2012

Once you’re over it that the campaign mode is an unambitious and mere 6hrs ride with some utterly ugly displays of brutality and a light bloom visual effect that fries all your retina you play the game how it’s probably meant to be played: and that’s in coop. The multiplayer versus an AI is rock solid and motivating as long as the occasional lags and bugs don’t add up. The weaponry is one of the better alongside Killzone, the dystopia setting is appealing, the missions are diverse, the bosses challenging. All in all Syndicate is not a milestone but significantly better than most (hyped?) shooters out there. Plus Rosario Dawson is the voice actor for the fem part, yay.

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Developer: Starbreeze Studios
Publisher: Electronic Arts
Platforms: PC, PlayStation3, Xbox360
Release: February 24th, 2012

This is why I love Capcom. Their games always have that certain feel that they are aware that the games they release are truly video games and no substitute for experiences which were better presented in movie form or else. In this case there’s a demigod bristling with anger fighting to get his girl back. So far so epic but as you can see there’s not much meta going on here. Not unlike Bayonetta Asura’s Wrath succeeds in its over the top direction and production of japanese mythology and sic-fi blending into QTE-laden gameplay (as you may know from Heavy Rain), sometimes referencing shmups and H&S. One can argue that the gameplay as such is crude but it’s straight forward and gets the shit done. It’s a love or hate matter. And I love it. It’s a video game. And a good one for sure.

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Developer: CyberConnect2
Publisher: Capcom
Platforms: PlayStation3, Xbox360
Release: February 24th, 2012

Black metal has been prone to hype ever since cascadian bands like Wolves in the Throne Room and Skagos opened the bm door a crack and leaving it ajar until next wave kids like Liturgy and Deafheaven kicked in and pushed bm into broad daylight of mainstream. What’s been seen can not be unseen and therefore a genre has to face a new era – a fact that’s not always welcome but inevitable. Some time ago I attended a concert of UK-based band Lich where some opening act called Sun Worship unveiled an uninspired blackened reverie sound in front of an american apparel crowd. I was intrigued yet shocked. So this is the new face of bm? Needless to say that already other genres such as dubstep were gentrified in that exact manner. This misadventure however made me cautious about new bm bands. Ash Borer fortunately unshackle anything overly formulaic and give themselves disarmingly trve even though they could probably line up and draft in the slipstreams of above mentioned pioneers. On their s/t however they stay frostbitten that you actually really need a scarf. Thanks for that.

Label: Pesanta Urfolk
Format: 12″ LP
Release: Summer, 2011

After a long abstinence of (action) RPGs I played through the tedious realms of Skyrim and felt more like a clerk working through inflationary questlines of little to no relevance that I pretty much got sick and tired of soap opera plot generators where some elfin thieves hustle some dough that made the orc gang go rampage and the autistic dwarf monk guild don’t respect that the undead have a gothic revival party at the local graveyard. Maybe it’s just the genre. Wait no, I can play Diablo to a certain extend. Well I guess it’s that middle earthy fantasy thing that’s just turning me off. Nah, I devoured Dark Souls (street cred, you know?). So it must be the ‘it’s for fans’ fact’ of the H&S-laden and not-so-RPG Kingdoms of Amalur that I can’t get into!? Point taken. Wait a sec, are you related to Owain Glyndwr?

Plus: it’s PG-rated 18 in Germany!? WTF!?
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Developer: 38 Studios, Big Huge Games
Publisher: Electronic Arts
Platforms: PC, PlayStation3, Xbox360
Release: February 9th, 2012

I remember that I played a tennis game on my Gameboy ages ago. The crowd sounded like a waterfall. I was pretty addicted to it. Anyways. It never triggered me to watch the real deal. Not even an alpha male like Steffi Graf attracted my attention. 20 years later – not necessarily any wiser though – the crowd still sounds like a waterfall, tennis is still boring – or rather a game I can’t get into, even with flick-it controls. Ping Pong seems to have more street cred with artists like Anti Pop Consortium, Art Blakey, Swayzak, Ratatat and even Dolly Parton naming songs after this sport. So I’d rather stay in the back of the bus and stick to Rockstar’s notorious table tennis.
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Developer: EA Canada
Publisher: EA Sports
Platforms: PlayStation3, Xbox360,
Release: February 14th, 2012

I was not really hoping for a hurrah after their promising debut ‘Last City’. Being completely honest with every follow-up and every concert I went to they became more and more blurry to me and undecided where to head next. But if it all was a painful way to get to this record now, I’ll appreciate every second they confused me. ‘IV’ is finally the record I never expected, not only keeping up to their debut’s level, but easily surpassing it in any way ending with the fact that this may well be the best emo hardcore record I’ve heard in ages.

Label: Deathwish Inc.
Format: 12″ LP, Digital
Release: January 17th, 2012